1. DISBELIEVE your clients. Try, "You remember you said you really wanted this? Well I don't believe you. We're three months in and nothing much has changed. You're paying me to help you, so let's see some changes!" Note: Use this carefully and only in excellent rapport with your client.
2. Always REMEMBER their birthday by sending a card. Include a quote they might like and optionally a small, thoughtful gift. Continue this even after they have finished coaching with you. If you no longer have their mail address, send an e-card.
3. DOUBLE it. Whatever action they come up with, double it. Wait, make that a triple! Often a client will simply suggest what is doable. Add excitement to a 'boring' but necessary goal, or simply take their exciting goal to the next level by doubling or tripling their action! They will (eventually) love you for it.
4. EASE the burden. Use their 5 senses to add components of something they LOVE to a task they dislike or avoid -- and stop them procrastinating. Maybe they'll wear a cashmere sweater to a difficult meeting, phone a good friend while cleaning the bathroom or have fresh flowers on their desk.
5. Show them HOW FAR they've come. Using 'The Wheel of Life' or your own 'Scorecard' of 5 questions (unique to your niche) simply ask your clients for their satisfaction scores out of 10 in each area -- when they start with you. Then, 3 or 6 months later, retake their satisfaction scores and review the differences. How far have they come? What has changed in their life? If their goals are qualitative, like to be calmer or more confident, ask them how calm and how confident they feel in life right now -- out of 10 -- and get them to write it on their goals sheet. Then simply revisit and compare as before.
6. ENRICH their lives. Help them explore their 5 senses to find meaningful activities and things that will enrich and round out their lives. Think colour, music, smell, taste and touch.
7. Follow YOUR Agenda. Although each of us is infinitely unique, most of our fears and wants are variations on the same themes. We fear rejection, we want to feel loved for who we are, we want inner peace, we want meaning in our lives. So, give your clients exercises around these common themes. Try "What Makes Your Heart Sing?", "The Rocking Chair Exercise" or get them brainstorming their values. Even if it isn't what they originally came to you for, these essential insights will move them forwards.
8. Bring out their INNER GRANDMOTHER/FATHER. This is about wisdom and perspective. Get them to imagine they are 90 and full of experience, wisdom and appreciation for the world. What possibilities do they see now? What really matters to them? How are they different? Give them a magic wand and see what they do with it! This works well after asking the same questions but imagining they are 5 years old -- and comparing and contrast the responses.
9. Ask for FEEDBACK - MONTHLY. Use this to find out what worked for them, what didn't, what they want support around next month. You could even ask for a testimonial or success story, which does double-duty because you get a testimonial AND they get to review what they've achieved.
10. SHOW UP their gremlins. When a gremlin or limiting belief rears its head try asking, "How old do you feel right now?" This simple question brings them back into the present moment -- and themselves.
11. Give them NOTHING to do. And I don't mean don't give them any homework! I mean, their homework IS to DO NOTHING. Get them to pick a day where they plan absolutely nothing. Then, IN each moment, they simply do whatever takes their fancy. It could be nothing. It could be a trip to the beach, to read a book until their foot goes numb, to bake a cake, watch the sunset or call a friend. Who knows? But no planning -- spontaneity is the name of the game.
Copyright 2009 Simplicity Life Coaching Ltd.
Emma-Louise Elsey is the CEO of Simplicity Life Coaching Ltd. and The Coaching Tools Company.com. She is a certified Life Coach, NLP practitioner and recovering perfectionist who loves creating coaching tools, writing and over the years has worked with many successful professionals and business owners.
Free Coaching Tools: So, if you're curious, there are Free Coaching Tools and templates for you at The Coaching Tools Company.com. There's a complimentary Wheel of Life, Coach Question Sheets to get clients unstuck, set extraordinary goals as well as business templates for new coaches and seminar organization - and we add more Coaching Tools and free resources on a monthly basis!
And while you're there, you may want to sign-up for our monthly ezine -- The Launch Pad -- and get my all-time favourite tool "Troll Travels - Who am I?" as a sign-up gift. Be the first to hear about new tools, get special subscriber discounts and links to other useful coaching resources!
If you have any other questions or suggestions - just give me a shout, I'd love to hear from you!
Emma-Louise Elsey helps fellow coaches raise their game with awesome coaching articles, exercises and tools at The Coaching Tools Company.com. And coming in Fall 2011 she helps people coach themselves to find happiness and meaning at Bite-Sized Life Coaching.com
Rebecca is a well known Coach, Consultant and Trainer and President and founder of Leadership Insight Inc. Developer of the newly launched 'Confident Coach' training program that transforms Managers into Coaches.Rebecca 's strength is understanding personal behaviour and drivers of success in a business context.
Pearl’s clients become better leaders, and better people. They are better at having the real conversations that create results. They are better at moving their organization towards the changes they believe in. They are working more collaboratively and learning to thrive in teams and partnerships.
Michael brings 25+ years of experience in business to his role as President of N.C.I. Solutions Limited. Michael learned and developed his skills in the trenches, operating running and managing many areas of a third generation business family. As a trained facilitator, mediator and public speaker,
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